July 14, 2017


you are 2 years and 9 months old. here are some things I don't want to forget about you
  •  you sleep in a big boy bed, with no sussie anymore. you have an ikea duvet set and real pillow. when I come into your room sometimes at night for whatever reason, you look way to big but yet so little in your big boy bed. you're falling asleep around 8:15/8:30pm and are up between 6-6:30am during the week. thankfully because no one is up and showering on the weekends, there have been a few times you've slept in either close to or past 7am
  • you have a cup of milk and usually peanut butter toast every morning for breakfast. sometimes you'll share cereal with me or have a yogurt. daddy likes to make fancy breakfast on the weekends and you love to munch on bacon
  • the two things you ask for first thing in the morning is either play cars or watch iPad. if you're tired and more on the lazy side, you like to watch the iPad for a bit to wake up. 
  • you love, love, LOVE to play with your big bucket of cars. cars, monster trucks, diggers.. the whole shebang. you make the sounds of a monster truck constantly and for very long periods of time. you have so many other cool and fun toys but all you want to do is play with your cars and monster truck toys
  • you still nap in the afternoons. you sleep from 1-1:30pm until 3-3:30pm. some days you probably don't need a nap, but to avoid grouchiness and bedtime meltdowns, you nap. at the lake when we've skipped naps, you've done fine. at home, not so much
  • the lake is your happy place. you are so good out there for us. you love to play at the park, go for golf car rides, play at the beach & coming golfing with everybody. you sleep on nana & papa's camper table like a rockstar. the lake this year has been our funnest and easiest year with you yet
  • you are not super confident in the water. you like to walk in and then walk back out over and over. you don't like to jump in and you don't like getting submerged. just a couple of weeks ago, you swam in the deep end for the first time ever with your puddle jumper! it was super exciting but that's the only "swimming" you've done so far. we hope to put you in the swim school come winter time so you can learn some safe techniques and build up that confidence!
  • you still love your jubejube very much. he comes everywhere with us still. now that sussie is gone, you sleep with 2 broken sussies. it's a giraffe party in bed with you. 
  • you have 4 special little girl friends at daycare, Maya, Reese, Sadie & Charolette. you say "no tammy's house" every morning before we have to go. but you have the best time once you're there. hasn't been easy to take you to daycare when you're asking me to stay home
  • I think daddy is your favourite person. he acts crazy with you, does silly things with you and of course, plays monster trucks with you better then I do. daddy is wild and silly and you love it
  • we have one week of holidays with you at the end of July and that'll be out last stretch of holidays together as a family of 3. I'll be done work at the beginning of November and your baby brother or sister will be delivered at the end of November.
 we love your funny but loving personality. you say and do such silly things lately. you are pretty sensitive but yet fiery at the same time. you are cautious caius, there's no doubt about that. it doesn't mean you miss out on things, you just take a little while to warm up to the idea and then enjoy. we love you so much buddy.

July 10, 2017

19 Weeks

 *edit, had my 19 week check up on Thursday July 13th

How Far Along: 19 weeks, half way there for us as baby will be delivered via c-section at 39 weeks!
Symptoms: lower back and tailbone pain. started very early on and is still an issue. I also dislocated a rib a couple of weeks ago. then I had a fall last week on Caius' slip and slide.. I fell on my left hip/thigh and I've completely screwed up my pelvic area. it hurts so bad and is so uncomfortable. by the end of the day, it's horrible. I saw a chiro last week and he suggested it could be a sprung pelvis or SPD {symphysis pubic dysfunction}, which would cause me a lot of grief for the rest of the pregnancy. I went to fetal assessment at RUH yesterday because all weekend long, it was just so bad. they don't think it's either of the things listed above. it's just the way my body is reacting to the relaxin and it's unfortunate it's so early on. I'll be going for massages, to the chiro and having Neil massage areas at home to combat the pain. my OB says it probably won't go away now until after delivery and the fall probably expedited it
Weight Gain: 191lbs.
Maternity Clothes: definitely. I started to show much, much earlier this time around. bring on the comfy t-shirts and maternity shorts
Belly Button in or Out: in
Sleep: sleeping okay but it's painful to turn over so that will wake me up a few times throughout the night
Best Moment This Week: seeing our baby for the first time at our 18 week ultrasound! I love seeing the hands and feet, legs and arm. it hit both of us that holy cow, we're really having a second baby!the heart rate was at 130bpm so I instantly thought girl, but then at RUH it was between 150-160bpm so I still have no idea what we're having. I 1000% knew Caius was a boy right from the beginning. this time, I'm so unsure!
Worst Moment This Week: falling and completely screwing up my pelvic area and lower back, f*ck the pain is bad and uncomfortable
Movement: I thought I felt some flutters a week ago. it didn't happen for long or was consistent. I have an anterior placenta again so it takes a little bit longer for me to feel movement. hopefully soon!
Queasy or Sick: thank goodness the first trimester is over. I felt sick all the time, didn't want to eat anything and then at the 14/15 week mark, it just flipped completely to not feeling sick and wanting to eat always
Looking Forward To: getting massaged tonight and seeing the chiro tomorrow to relieve some pain {exciting right}
Cravings: no cravings really, just let me eat everything
Recently Purchased: purchased a couple of neutral sleepers & sleeping gowns
Other: I had my 19 week check up today and overall it was a good appointment. disappointing to hear that this pain won't go away until after baby is delivered and also my blood pressure is a bit high right now. probably from the discomfort caused by the pain. couple of good things is baby's heart rate was at 150bpm, we'll get to choose our delivery date, I'll be able to request a clear curtain and delayed clamping so that I can interact with baby before they are taken to be examined. felt really nice to be reassured that I get a say with this c-section and my doctor supports all requests. it'll be a much better delivery experience this time around then it was with Caius which makes me feel actually excited and happy about our elective c-section decision!

18 weeks old!

June 21, 2017

Life Lately

there's been so much going on this past month or so and time is going by so fast that I don't want to forget all of it!

Caius is just growing and changing so much that we've had to make changes that suit where he is at right now. I bought him a cot to sleep in at daycare because there was no need for him to sleep in the playpen anymore. that's one thing that we're extremely lucky with and I'm so proud of him with how the adjustment from crib to "real beds" went. from day 1 of not being in a crib anymore, he has never, ever got out of his bed. at home, at the lake, at grandparents and at daycare. I still think he doesn't understand the concept that he can get in and out of bed as he pleases (he does during non-bedtime hours) but he just won't do it when it's naptime or bedtime. super thankful for that but I kind of find it funny too. neil built his real big boy bed on fathers day and again, it was a super easy transition. it sure is nice being able to lay in bed with him to read a book or to cuddle for a bit.

and of course, the biggest thing of all is that we finally pulled the plug on the beloved sussie. it's been on our minds for quite a while now but we just didn't feel confident to actually do it. he only really had it when going to sleep or if he was tired/ not feeling well so he didn't have it 24/7 but it was such a big deal to him. we decided to talk about the sussie fairy and how she would come to take sussies to babies who need them. we talked about it quite a bit the last month or so and more so during the past week in order to prep him for what was to come. we decided to purchase him a ride on jeep that would be his gift from the sussie fairy and it worked pretty darn well! he did great with putting all of his sussies into a bucket for her and was super excited about the jeep. bedtime was a little tough once he realized he was having to go to sleep without sussie. but overall it went much, much better then we were anticipating. hopefully it's only a tough days and we will be back to a normal bedtime and wake up (it was a 5:30am start to the day, post 1st night without it)

I'm super proud and excited for him. there's so many big changes happening and it's really making it real that he's no longer a baby/toddler anymore.. he's coming a big boy and will be a big brother before we know it!

May 29, 2017

13 Weeks

How Far Along: 13 weeks + 2 days
Symptoms: the nausea and food aversions aren't as bad anymore but will still randomly hit. evenings tend to be the worst. I'm still lacking energy and feel lazy all the time. our bed is my favourite place to be as soon as Caius is down for the night. I'm a very lame wife as of lately...
Gender: we won't be finding out the gender because we will be having an elective c-section for the sake of my health and to avoid preeclampsia complications so we will know the date & time baby will be delivered and keep the gender a surprise!
Sleep: sleep has improved but lately I wish that any moment I have, I could be laying in bed or taking a nap
Looking Forward To: the 14 week checkup next week with my OBGYN and hearing a heartbeat
Cravings: none so far
Recently Purchased: an official big boy bed for Caius. he's doing great with his toddler-crib conversion bed but I just felt it was time to get a real bed for him. daddy still has to build it and we need to purchase a twin mattress for it. baby probably won't be getting anything new until he or she arrive. if it's a he, we're set and if it's a girl, bring on the new clothes! I did purchase a dock-a-tot in between trying to get pregnant so that's something new & exciting we'll get to try!

May 24, 2017

9 Weeks {April 30th}

this pregnancy has been kicking my butt. feeling nauseous all day long, very tired, no energy food aversions, getting really hungry but then when I start to eat I feel sick. I didn't have any of these symptoms with Caius. I only got sick while taking the prenatal vitamin first thing in the morning, changed that and I was good. I feel like a super lame wife and mom as of lately. hoping this junky phase goes away quickly. we've had 3 ultrasounds since I found out I was pregnant. the first was to go and confirm dates since my cycles varied. we weren't able to see much {obviously it was very early}. I experienced some spotting shortly after the ultrasound and panicked that something was wrong so I went in again and saw everything was okay and there was a very low heartbeat. doctor wanted to do a followup to make sure that heartbeat went up and it did, to a 165bpm and still a December 2nd due date!

How Far Along: 9 weeks & 2 days
Symptoms: nausea, dislike for most food & eating, tired, SORE sore boobs at the end of the day.. the whole shebang
Sleep: super tired, asleep before 9:30pm and waking once or twice during the night
Best Moment This Week: seeing a healthy strong heartbeat at the ultrasound appointment
Worst Moment This Week: feeling so darn junky all the time

Queasy or Sick: 100%
Looking Forward To: making our announcement soon

May 14, 2017


on Sunday March 26th, we found out I'm pregnant!!!

I have been taking tests close to my period each month, in hope that a positive sign would show up. I had taken 2 tests last week and both were negative so I was just waiting for my period to show up. sunday morning I stepped out to grab one more to try. I was a week late but that was the only sign. I truly thought it was going to be negative since all the others have been, so I was in total shock when the positive sign slowly started to show. my heart was beating out of my chest, just like it did with Caius and my hands were shaking. I quickly called Caius to his room to put on a shirt I had bought last year that said #1 big bro. when I opened Caius' room door to have him show Neil, Neil was already standing in our room across the hall. he looked at Caius and then looked at me with big eyes "really?!" of course I was crying and said I think it's positive. I always find out on the stupid cheap pregnancy tests! I think to myself I've already spend so much on the fancy ones and they've all been duds, I'll just buy the cheap ones.

 we had two family birthday parties on sunday. one for our niece who was turning 2 and another for my cousin celebrating his 23rd. we decided since we would be seeing everyone from both sides that we would share the news. Caius wore his big brother shirt to both get togethers. we had to point out his shirt on Neils side and my mom read Caius' shirt right away when him and I walked in. she started crying and saying "oh my god!" and then everyone else noticed too. both families are so excited.

we have been trying to get pregnant since June 2016. this time took much longer than it did with Caius which was really frustrating, and a little defeating. each month was another negative test and another period. we were more casual and not really in a rush once I got my IUD out but once we got past the 6 months of trying mark, I started to worry. I kept wondering "is something wrong with me?" "what changed body wise since having Caius and now?" "is Caius going to be our one and only?". really similar thoughts the first time we tried to get pregnant. it just seems to take us longer to get pregnant. not easy to think that way in the midst of trying. one of the first things I said to Neil when we found out was I felt such a relief. finally we're pregnant, nothings wrong with me. of course there's a risk with it being so early. I know so many women who have gone through miscarriages so I feel a little more nervous right now but I don't want those nerves to dampen our excitement that we're feeling right now. still feels surreal that I'm pregnant and even more surreal that my baby won't be just my baby anymore, he'll be a big brother in 9 months! we can't wait!

How Far Along: based on last period, and cycle length etc., says I'm about 5 weeks
Symptoms: no symptoms at all 
Weight: went to the doctor this morning for a scheduled wellness checkup.... I'm 187lbs....
Sleep: I was asleep by 8:30pm on Saturday night and the last few days, I feel super tired
Best Moment This Week: seeing the + pregnancy sign and telling all of our family that day
Worst Moment This Week: none so far
Queasy or Sick: nope
Looking Forward To: we have an ultrasound scheduled for april 3rd

March 22, 2017

Big Boy Bed

last night was a big night in our house, we converted the crib into a big boy bed!

it's been on my mind for a little while. we've had no issues with him and his crib. he never tried to escape, he never even stood up in it. when he wakes up, he would just lay there moaning ha. I've been bouncing back & forth about how we were going to do it, when we were going to do it. then last night after we all got home from the work day, my husband said "it'll take 5 minutes to do" and all of a sudden it was done.

Caius did SO so well! he asked for his sleepsack a handful of times before we left the room. he's not a huge fan of blankets so we assumed that would be our biggest challenge. we ended up putting his sleepsack beside his face, to use a blanket for comfort. he laid there while falling asleep, not even trying to get up and out and was asleep by 8pm! the monitor came on at 4:15am, he was standing holding a side rail. I figured he lost JubeJube in between the blankets, which is what happened. I tucked it in by his face, kissed him and back to sleep he went.

he had the sweetest little smile on his face when we woke him up this morning. he had to show us what he slept in as we we're getting ready for the day AND had to share the news with his daycare provider when I dropped him off

we are SO, so proud of him as he is also so proud of himself. still feels surreal that he's not really a baby anymore. he hasn't been for a while now but this is just another real step of him being a big boy.

 my big boy.